My Muse: Chapter 7

Natasha’s POV
It’s been a week now and no word on June.
I hope he’s not done something crazy. Did I do this to him? Oh God please protect him, I said, pacing
back and forth in my room.
I called his parents and friends again. Still there was no word.
I became really tensed. I couldn’t even eat. I was really scared and worried.
I decided to pray again. I’ve been fasting and praying on his head for three days now. I just hope he’s fine.
After praying, I took my phone and went through my messages and mails to see if he sent anything but
there was nothing.
I came across Oscar’s mail. He sent it three days ago but I didn’t feel like talking to anyone till I set my
eyes on June.
I’ve also been ignoring April. I just didn’t want her comments on this. I just want my June back.
Oscar’s POV
“Oscar you’ve still not touched your food”, Mabel said to me and I snapped out of my thoughts.
I’ve been really worried concerning Natasha. She’s still not replied my mail yet and I can’t tell if she’s fine
or not.
I wanted to go to the hospital but I didn’t want to pry too much, so I’ll just wait till the day of my
appointment with her.
“I was just thinking of certain things”, I said to Mabel.
“Mmm, okay”, she said as usual, not asking further questions.
“Please eat your food, we have to get ready and go see your mum”, she said.
“What?” I asked.
“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten. It’s our anniversary today babe and you promised to take me to your mum
this time for me to prove to her that I’m worthy of being with you. This might even be the best time to let
her know that we’re engaged”, she said, smiling.
“I don’t think it’s a good idea. Let me go alone today and explain things to her and then I can take you to
her another time”.
“Mmm, okay. You’ve forgotten that today is our anniversary right?” She asked me.
“I did remember and I got you something”, I said and I went to my room.
Yeah, I did remember our anniversary. I was the one who asked her out, so I do remember. Today made it
a complete three years of our relationship.
I took out the wrapped gift from my wardrobe and walked back to the dining room.
I placed it in her hands and she unwrapped it quickly. She was really excited about it but her excitement
vanished when she revealed the gift and I got confused.
“Anything wrong?” I asked her and she shook her head.
“Thank you Oscar”, she said giving me a side hug.
“You don’t like the gift?” I asked her and she shook her head.
“I do. It’s just that…..”, she tried saying but I cut in.
“You expected more? C’mon Mabel I customized that bracelet for you”, I said to her.
“Yeah, I know and I love it. I also got you something”, she said and she gave me a box. I took it out and I
smiled on seeing it.
It was a pair of shoe.
I already had something similar to this and she didn’t know obviously, but I appreciated it. It’s the thought
that counts.
“Thank you so much, Mabel”, I said hugging her and she smiled. This time it was real.
I took my seat and finished up with my food.
Today I was going to see my mum and talk to her about Mabel. I just hoped that she understands me this
After visiting her, I’d have to take Mabel out because it’s our anniversary.

“Mum, you would have to accept her because we’re engaged”, I said to my mum and her eyes widened.
“Yes mum. We’ll be getting married soon”, I said to her and her faced changed from an angry look to a
sad look.
“Oscar why can’t you just marry a good Christian girl”.
“Mum, she’s a Christian”.
“When was the last time she went to church, prayed, read the bible or do something which emulates
“I don’t know. She doesn’t have to do it in the open for me to see. At least she dresses decently and she’s a
good girl. She has a good heart and she goes to church too. Mum she’s changing. Just give her time”.
“Three years isn’t enough for her?”
“Why do you dislike her so much?”
“I don’t. I really like her because she’s a good girl. But I don’t want her for you. You can’t be a strong
Christian and marry someone who’s not. Didn’t you read what Paul said in the bible concerning this?”
“I know but I believe that she just needs time”, I said defending her.
“Okay, a word to the wise is enough”.
“Mum, don’t worry. I’ll be fine”.
“Okay. Have you eaten?” she asked.
“Yeah, I have”, I said, smiling at the fact that she dropped the topic and didn’t throw tantrums.
We kept on talking and my sister walked in.
On seeing me, she ran and jumped on me, hugging me.
Sonia was 19 years but she still acted as a kid around me and she was still a kid to me too.
“Hey baby girl, how are you”? I asked her.
“I’m fine. How are you too?”
“I’m fine. How’s school?” I asked her.
“It’s fine. We’ve already started out exams”.
“Really? So soon? And why are you home? Aren‟t you supposed to be in your hostel?”
“Mum refused to bring food to me, so I came home for it myself”, she said, glaring at my mum.
“Mum?!” I exclaimed.
“What? I missed her and I wanted her to come home”, my mum said and we all laughed.
“How’s Mabel?” My sister asked.
“She’s fine”, I said, smiling.
“Happy Anniversary though”, she said, grinning.
“How did you know?”
“On instagram duh. Mabel has posted your pictures all over. And yeah congratulations on your
engagement. Saw that one too and you didn’t even bother to tell us. Or mum did you know?” She asked,
looking at my mum.
“No, I just found out”, my mum said.
“I’m sorry Sonia. We were planning to visit you in school and let you know”.
“Mmm, I see”.
We all kept on talking and after a while, I left.
Natasha’s POV
I was in my room, trying to get some sleep when I heard the doorbell ring, I quickly rushed down the
stairs and when I opened it, I saw June standing there.
“June!!!” I exclaimed.
I hugged him really tight and stepped out from the way for him to come in.
“Where have you been?”
“We need to talk Tash”, he said.
“Yeah, but right now, I need you to rest and I‟ll get something for you to eat”, I said pulling him to the
sitting room.
“I’m fine Tash, we just need to talk right now”, he said, sounding frustrated.
“Okay”,I said sitting and he sat opposite me.
“Tasha, I think we have to call off the engagement”, he said.
“What are you talking about? Is everything okay?” I asked, not sure I heard him right.
“I’ve put you through a lot Tasha and I don’t deserve you”, he said, looking away and a tear drop fell from
his eye.
“June, where from all these?” I said, tearing up too. I couldn’t believe that this was happening. God if it’s a
dream, please wake me up. I can’t deal with this.
“Tasha, you’re a wonderful and loyal person. You need someone who will give you all the attention and
love you need. I don’t deserve you Tasha”.
“June don’t do this to me. I love you so much and I want to be with you. I’ll become supportive and
patient with you, just don’t leave me”, I said crying out loud.
“Tasha you’re making this difficult for me. I’ll always be busy at church, work and other places. You can’t
keep up with that, even if you do, you’ll hurt yourself”.
“Why are you doing this? Is it because of Freda? You think she’s the one who can keep up with church,
work and all that?” I asked getting angry.
“No Tasha, it’s about you not her and… “, he tried saying but I cut in.
“Where were you this whole time? You were with her right?” I asked with irritation and disgust.
“No Tasha. I can’t do that to you and you know that. I felt guilty about how sad and hurt you were in this
relationship and I went away to fast and pray concerning our relationship and concerning you. I wanted
God to help me become better for you. But I got a different revelation. I saw you in a white dress, but I
wasn’t standing by you. I was rather blessing your marriage. When I saw it, I freaked out and prayed
again telling God that he can’t do this to me. But I kept on seeing the same revelation. It really hurt me
and I cried for days Tasha. Do you know how it felt? I’m not the one for you Tasha. I’ll always be there
for you and I’ll always love you. But God’s will is the best”, he said, trying to control his tears.
I couldn’t believe this. God why??!
“June, I don’t think I can live without you”, I said.
“Don’t say that. You can. God knows best and he’ll bring someone your way and I’ll be there to wed you
two”, he said and I got angry at the fact that he was already talking about me and someone else.
“June please. Let’s pray to God together and tell him that we want each other. He’ll agree”, I said
“Tasha, don’t you think I’ve done that. Of course he can let us get married and we’ll be happy but his will
and way is always the best. Just trust him. This hurts me more than ever but I just placed my hope in him.
You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I don’t think there’s someone better than you but if
he’s got someone, then I can’t wait to see who that is. You should think the same way too. In my
revelation you looked really happy in your white dress. God has someone better Tash. Just trust him”, he
said and I calmed down a bit.
“Can I hug you for some time”, I asked him and he got up and sat by me. I placed my arms around him
and hugged him really tight. I started crying again and he comforted me.
I don’t know how I’m going to pull through. God please help me. I can’t, I can’t.
After a while June got up to leave.
“I’ll see you around Tash. Please do not cry. I need you to be strong, okay?” he said and I nodded.
Immediately he left, I ran to my mum’s room. She was asleep, but I didn’t care. I woke her up and told her
what happened. She tried consoling me but I couldn’t just stop the tears.
After a while, I fell asleep.
Oscar’s POV
I was in my room, playing games when Mabel walked in with a sad face.
On seeing her face, I stopped the game I was playing and asked her if everything was alright.
“You’ve been distant lately, Oscar. I’ve been in your house for a week now and you’ve not even slept by
me or touched me or anything. And you’ve still not placed the ring on my finger. I know we’re engaged
but I need the ring as a symbol”, she said and she sat on my thighs, wrapping her arms around my neck.
“I’m so sorry Mabel. I honestly forgot about the ring. I thought you actually had it on”, let me get it for
you, I said trying to get her off me but she held on to me really tight.
“Can’t we just get married soon? Not being able to sleep with you or touch you like that is killing me”,
she said, and I burst out laughing.
“I’m a guy, so it kills me more but we can’t do anything about it. We just have to wait”, I said, trying to
get her off me but she didn’t move.
“Mabel, don’t you want the ring again?” I asked her but she ignored me and kissed me.
“Mabel, stop it”. I said, trying to pull her off.
She finally got up. But she didn’t leave. She took off her clothes and that was how I lost control of myself.
We slept together that evening and every other evening.
Our relationship became sexual and I didn’t know how to stop it.
I didn’t know who to talk to about it. I couldn’t bring myself to talk to Natasha. I intentionally didn’t show
up for our next appointment.
For a week now, Mabel and I were glued to each other. I went to work late and came back home really
early just to be in bed with her.
One morning she woke up feeling dizzy and I got terrified when she told me that her period was late.


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